Thursday, September 9, 2010

The Real Meaning of life ( Fundamental Values)

Since the dawn of civilisation, human are perpetually seeking the real meaning of their very existence. The quest for enhancement of life can be mind-boggling and perplexing at certain times. The inception of religion such as Christianity , Islam, and Buddhism all aim at unveiling the myth surrounding the issue of the true purpose of life.In the same vein, moral codes and values are created and conveyed through either philospher or the so-called messenger of god. There are complex phiposophy, thick bible and religious book to propound and advocate the values and purpose of life, which can be very complicated and confounding.The values of lives is not static, it could be evolving according to changing circumstances. For example, modernisation has ushered in new values such as materialism and individualism.

Hence,it is incumbent that we dwell on the meaning of lives to discover our inner potential and know what is essentially good for us , by not succumb to the pressure of modernisation. I have commence on the journey to self -discovery since the beginning of this year as i felt that there are more to lives than just striving for good grade in examinations and winning in my endeavour.

Basically, i had read a few books and did a lot of introspection. Initially, i did not plan to share this with others. However, i was compelled to do so after i discover that sharing and giving is part of the process of self growth and i believe that we could succeed best by helping other to succeed and in this context, i believe that i could be a better person by helping others to be a better person. Below are the list of book i had read. Moreover , i also downloaded hundreds of the most essential quote from the internet which i will share in this post.

1) Harl Urban - Life's greatest lesson ( 20 Things That Matter)
2) Harl Urban - The 10 commandment of Common Sense
3) The Secret- Rhonda Byrne
4) The law of Attraction
5) 7 habit of highly effective people- Stephen R Covey
6) The path to peace- Buddhism quote
7) Weakness of Human Nature- Dale Carnegie

After reading all these books, i discover that all of them profess the dame fundamental values that had withtood the test of time. Harl Urban further corroborate this by stating that the values of life can be simple. The old school values is always true. I had studied the bible and the philosophy of buddha teaching and a dozen of moticational books and i found that they all try to convey the fundamental values of life, whether explicitly or implicitly. We dont need to follow complex theory and philosphy or rituals to be a good person. The fact is we need to retrace and breath new lease of life into the fundamental values of life to be a good person. The world is chaotic because human had forgotten or choose to ignore all there values and instead try to subjugate each other by pronouncing that their values and ways of life are valid and noble.

Having said that , what are the very essence of life?

1) Respect for life and each other.
I put this at the top of values of life as it is the lack of respect and reverence of life and humanity that lead to the chaos in this world. To respect life and humanity is to restrain from judging each other in negative light and tolerate each other differences. In other word, we need to look for the good in others instead of finding fault with them. It mean tolerance for religion, cultural and racial diffences. Failure to adhere to this result in racial conflict and religion clash, as exemplified by the recent furore over the suggestion to build a islam memorial and mosque at the premises of 911 tragedy. It is also reflected in the killing of jews under Hitler reign and the terrorist attack.

I found this quote very appealing : " I may not agree with you , I may argue with you , but i vow to protect your right to say and practice what you belive in, even to the extent of sacrificing myself.

We dont need obarma to be the middle man to resolve israel palestinian stalemate and conflict. We just need the people and leader of both country to cherish each other differences to ensure that peace prevail in there ares.

Basically , all the books i read enunciate this values

Harl Urban - The life greatest lesson- chapter 8 ( respect for life)
Dale carnegie- chapter 1- ( Fulfill others need, Do not criticise others and make others feel important)
Buddhism - The right thought and concentration ( two of the eight noble path)
Christianity- Commandment 4- Do not judge other people.

By the way, i learn to respect each other difference ever since i study in J7 and get to know people from other races as well as joining MUN conference where we need to respect the policy of other country.

This are a few more quote to guide you in practicing tolerance and respect for each other

1) Give so much to the improvement of yourself that you dont have any time to criticize others.

2) Everyone can criticise, but few can suggest better

3) The fault of others are easily perceived but that of oneself is difficult to perceive

4) When you want to be honoured by others, you must learn to honour them first.

5) It is wise not to judge others, lest we ourselved be judged and found wanting.

6) He that never changes his opinions , never corrects his mistakes and will never be wiser on tomorow tha today

2) Love and kindness.

It is true that hatred entangled and love disenfrancised. Love in this context transcend personal emation to each others. It means the love for all human and creature in this world, regardless of appearance, status, race, religion. It is to love everyone you see and emphatise with people who are underpriviledged. I believe it is pure love that propel great human such as mother terressa, Dr scheweitzer, Albraham lincoln, Martin Luther King, Nelson Mandella to make the world a better place. It is also true that all religion teaches love for each other. However, it is the failure to comply with the teaching the sow the sead of hatred. By the way, the commandment no 10 in bible is about doing everything in love.

Kindness cost little but achieve much. The very essence of life is to be kind to each other. However, more often than not, human regard it as something "cool' to be sarcastic, cruel and indifference. Many people think that being rude and sarcastic to each other is the best way to proclaim that they are superior and serve as the best way to protect their fragile self esteem.However,this may backfire.Many people are hurt by abusive language and sarcasm.

The best way to love and be kind to each other is to watch our manner and language. We should be polite, courteous , thoughtful and considerate. We have to treat people with dignity, respect and love.

We also need to be sensitive to the language we use when communicate with each other. we need to use gracious word instead of destructive one.Buddhism clearly teach us to practice the right speech ( One of the 8 noble path ) and the third commandment of christianty is to refrain from using destructive language.

Listed below are positive language

a) Praise
b) Sincere Compliment
c) Encouragement
d) thanks
e) Truth / honesty
f) Symphatise and Emphatise
g) Advice
h) greetings
i) Support

Listed below are negative language
a) Put down others with discouragind words
b) Swearings
c) Biting sarcasm
d) Name-calling
f) Laugh at other failure
h) Complaining and lamenting
i) Gossiping/ rumour
j) Yelling
k) Insincere Flattery
l) Racist and Sexist insults
m) Lying
n) Blaming.

Below are a few quote to guide us to be more loving and kind.

1) Where there is love, there is life

2) Life is the flower for which love is the honey

3) You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection

4) To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both side

5) Love is the beauty of the soul

6) Love conquers all ; let us surrender to love

7) To be loved, be lovable.

8) We can do no great things, only small things with great love

9) Sincerity in love engender trust, sincerity in thought engender pure living.

10) When we are kind and generous to others, we will receive thoughdfulness and love

11)Just as dews refreshes the wilting flowers, tenderness restores the grieving heart.

12) Only when we have compassion for all beings , will we have peace.

13) Unkind speech can destroy that which is kind can bring peaces and change the world.

14) The mind of compassion knows no bitterness, no judgement, no good, no bad, no right, no wrong,no you , no me, only the wish for all beings to be happy.

3) Honesty is always the best policy

Honesty is a prerequisite for a peaceful mind. It is the most essential ingredient for success. Honesty is integrity. It mean being truthful and frank with ourselves and others.

We need to discard the attitute that " Every body is doing it, So did i, Somehow being a little dishonest is OK"

Somehow, this is what exactly we often refer as Malaysian Mentality. We often tolerate minor disonesty and turn a blind eye on scandal and mismanagement of fund. It cannot be denied that this is one of the reason why corruption is so rampant in Malaysia.

We need to be honest for 6 very good reason

1) Peace of Mind

We would save ourselves from feeling guity and embarassed when we relect on dishonest thing we have done and said in the past

2) Character and reputation

It make us a good person

3) relationship

Dishonesty will ruin relationship as there is the lack of basic element of trust

4) Allow us to be our real self

We dont need to hide behind a mask.We can be who we really are. We will then begin to respect ourselves and feel good.

5) good career

We would gain more by honest mean rather that cheating. A honest lawyer ( I hope to be..hehe) will gain the trust of his client and build lasting relationship and ensure stable source of income. His client will inturn recommend him to others, this is a multiplier effect.............

6) World peace

The world is chaotic because many leaders are corrupted.

4) Being thankful

I have to admit than more often than not, i always try to look for somthing better in life without being grateful for what i have.It is always true that we seldom think of what we have but always what we lack.hence, we always complain and lament about life.It is time that we focus of what is right and good in this world, instead of what is wrong and bad.

being Thankful is always link to contentment. We need to be contented and enjoy what we have. The world is in chaos because countries are greedy and yearn for each others resources. Rich country engage in unfairn trade practices to get richer , at the expense of other poorer countries.People try to manioulate and con others. The society become more engross in greed for material withour sparing a thought for the underprivileged and disadvantaged,

In addition, being thankful is synonymous to always express our appreciation and gratitute to others, in simple buy magical phrase: " Thank you". We need to say thank you for others who do us a favour, in order to show our gratitute. This would in turn make others feel good . We need to tell others that they are special and important to us and we appreciate them. This would certainly make the world a better place as each person would feel good being appreciated.

This is perfectly why thanksgiving is once held every year. But we dont need to wait till that day to express our gratitute, we could make each day a thankgiving day, but simply saying thank you and express our deep apreciation for each others.

Below are a few quote to help us to me more grateful and content.

1) We never appreciate the value of water until the well runs dry

2) The biggest lesson i learned from my experience in Africa was that if you have all the fresh water you want to drink and all the food you want to eat, you ought never to complain about anything- Eddie Rickenbacker.

3) I Look at the world every morning and be thankful to all the beauty around you and for the fact that you are still alive.

4) An Attitute of gratitute opens the portals to a richer, more abundant life.

The section below are more incline toward self motivation and help us to be a more holistic individual as i believe we must be the change we need to see in this world. The change in then world must start with the changes among individuals.

5) Positive Thinking/ Optimism.

In this section, i wish to focus on the law of attraction. The fundamental value of this law is the underlying need for positive thinking. Please refer to my ealier post to get more idea about this law. The law of attraction basically require us to focus on positive aspects of life in order to allow the law to reciprocate by sending positive energy back to us to achieve positive/ intended result. It is basically like a reflection of light from a metal. The law will reflect what is inside our mind. If we think negatively, we will get negative result in return.

hence , we need to focus on the intended positive outcome.It is imperative that we do not have any doubt about what we intended and make sure that we form a positive mental picture inside our mind.

The best way is to use the phrase " I am in the process of"...achieving something as the use of phrase like " i must " will cause us to doubt ourselves.

We could make a postive statement and focus on it everyday to get a positive outcome

This is my personal statement, just for reference.

I am in the process of

becoming

a) Patient
b) kind
c) caring and compassionate
d) optimistic
e) thankful and not complaining
f) calm and not worry about the future
g) courteous and use kind language
h) funny and humorous
i) tolerance and open to new experience
j) a person who smile everyday
k) self - confient
l) a person who devoted to help others to succeed
m) a lawyer who has integrity and passionate in upholding human right
n) A rich lawyer
o) A student in Queensland University
p) a student who score ter 97.5 in SAM exam

Remember : we could always choose our own attitute. The option is in our hand. We can choose to be postive and reap the benefit , or indulge in negative thinking and languishing in constant worry and negative outcome.

Below are a few quote to help us to be positive

a) The more you praise and celebrate life, the more there is in life to celebrate

b) Begin each day as if it is on purpose

c) A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity while an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty

d) The positive thinker
1) Sees the invincible
2) Feels the intangible
3) And achieve the impossible

e) Wherever you go, go with all your heart

f) it is your attitute, not just your aptitute, that will determine your altitute.

g) I am not what has happened to me, i am what i chose to become

h ) Make a game of finding something positive in every situation.

Self confident and self- esteem

It is surprise that even the best among the people, the creme de la creme often seek approval and praise from other. We just need to look at the shenanigans of the superstar to understand their desperate desire and need to bask in the limelight. people do everything to be in the centre of attention. They basically live on others approval. They need other's praise to sustain their lives. How sad and pathetic that is in the sense that they have all their happiness in others keeping and they enslave themselves to the comment of others.

We need to know that we are unique and worthwhile , and that each of us has special talent and deserve to be who we are and be respected by others. We need to maintain our composure in the face of insensitive remark by others and remind ourselves that we are who we are there is no point compromising our real self to adapt to what other's want from us.

Self esteem and self confident invlove the courage to demand others to respect who we are and the courage to voice our disapproval on others.It involve assertive behaviour, which is the ability to state our need and wants appropriately without offending others.

However, we need to be aware that we do not let our self confident get overboard.

After reading the book written by Harl Urban ,' the life greatest lesson , ( can find in taylor college library and major bookshop ) , i come to realise that self -confident is engendered by self -respect. In other word, self confident can only be achieved when we respect ourselves and accept who we are.

To have self respect , there are several guideline:

a) Be kind

It is impossible to feel good about ourselves when we are mean, selfish or insensitive. The better we treat others, the better we feel about ourselves. The more we affirm people, the more we grow as human beings. Still remember earlier i talk about the need to be kind and respect others?

b) Be honourable

This involve being honest and uphold integrity i mentioned earlier. We will feel good when we are honest

c) Be productive

We would feel good about ourselves if we work hard and being productive in whatever endeavour, be it learning or working.

D) Be positive

We cant feel good about ourselves if our head is full of negative thoughtt. We need to give ourselves credit. remember what i mentioned earlier? we can choose our attitute and be positive

Below are a few quote for self -help

1) No one can make you feel inferior without your permission

2) the biggest mistake in life is to think that we work for someone else but ourselves

3) Trust yourseld that you will know how to live

4) You deserve others attention and love

5) If you cant get a compliment from anybody, pay yourself one

6) Never bend your head; Always hold it high. Look the world straight in the face

7) They cannot take away our self respect of we do not give it to them

8) There would be nothing to frighten you, of you refuse to be frightened

9) Someone's opinion of you does not have to become a reality

10) Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow

11) Dont let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do.

12) Today you are you, that is truer than true . there is no one alive who is youer than you

13) Never bend you head, always hold it high . Look the world straight in the face

14) Too many people overvalue ehaty they are not and undervalue what they are

15) when people say no, tell them yes

16) If you dont see yourself as a winner, you cannot perform as a winner

6) The courage to accept that life is hard and is not always fair.

Many people live in dillusion that the world is a bed of rose. It is not, It is a bed of thorn instead. Life doesn't work the way we like it to. The world will not devote itself to make us happy. Life is full of difficulties and obstacles. This is also the very reason which make life interesting. Imagine the world being wothout any challenge...Wouldnt life be dull and boring then? The difficulties and obstacle in life is also a great teacher. It teach us to persevere and be strong in the face of adversity. It build up our character and resillience.

Life is not always fair also. Bad things might happen to good people. As the bible says" The sun rise upon evil man as well as good'. We live in an imperfect world with other imperfect people . No one promise that we would always get what we strive for and that life is fair.

Gautama Buddha realsie this hundreds years ago when he introduce the 4 noble truth, with the fist one being" Life is full of suffering"

hence, we need to accept the reality of life. Many people who fail to do so will always lament and complain about how the world is harsh and things dont work out for them. Things will get worse the more they complain. ( remember the law of attarction?)


Below are a few quote for guidance


1) If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant; if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome

2) Its is kind of fun to do the impossible.

3) experience is what you get when you do not get what you want

4) The price of excellence is discipline, the cost of medicrity is disappointment
Failure is a norm

5) Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffereing can the soul be strengthened , vision cleared , ambtiion inspired and success achieved

6) I have nothing to offer, but blood, sweat, toils and tears

7)Live in the present.

Too many people are bogged down by guilty feeling of past experience or are traumatized. Hence, this hamper their future. Most important, we need to live in the present to the fullest

1) The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn about the past or anticipate trouble, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.

2) Dont worry, be happy

3 ) 99 % of what we worry does not become reality

4) And in the end, it is not the years in your life that count, it is the life in your years

5) Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorow

6) there is no future in the past



7) Failure is a norm
It is okay to fail. Everyone does . thomas edison fail 9999 time before inventing lamp. We need to be courageous in face of adversity and failure. we need to pick oursleves up when we fails and try again next time. We should not let failure defeat us . Failure is a soure of renewed energy , It teaches us

a) humility- that we are not invincible

b) to correct or course of action

c) about the need to persevere and build up the strength of character

It is also okay to make a mistake. It is a learning process. If we did not make any mistake, we are not learning anything new.

Hence, the next time we fail and make mistake, we should not be frustrated . We need to muster our courage to try again the next time, till our last breath.

Here are a few quote for guidance

a) Our greatest glory is not in never failling, but in rising everytime we fall.

b) Dont be afraid to fail, dun waste energy tring to cover up failure. learn from your failure and go on to the next challenge. IT's okay to fail. if you're not failing, you 're not growing.

c) A quitter never wins and a winner never quits.

d) Dont cry because it's over, smile because it happened.

e) Anyone who never make a mistake has never try someting new

f) When you get to the end of the rope, tie a knot and hang on.

g) You dont lose of you get knocked down, You lose if you stay down.

h) we work to become, not to acquire

j) Courage is the discovery that you might not win and trying when you know you can lose

k) Courage doesnt always roar; sometimes, courage is teh quiet voice at the end of the day saying :" I will try again tomorow"

l) everyone and anyone can give up, it is the easiest thing to do, but to hold on when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength

m) Obstacle does not need to stop you, if you run into the wall, dont turn around, and give up. figure out how to climb it, go throught it or walk around it

n) The game isnt over until it is over

8) Live life with passion and determination to succees

Passion is the zeal in doing something. It is the conviction we deeply held and believed. When we do anything with passion, we achive great things. We also engender belief among others. People always like to work along side individuals who are full of energy and passion. We could inspire other to great success with our passion. With passion, we would also put in our best and not tolerate anyhthning less. hence, it is not wrong to say thatbPassion is the source of great achievement

We must also be determined to success. It is the detrmination to be succesful that fuel our passion

Below are a few quote for guidance.

1) It is kind of fun to do the impossible

2) Empty pocket never held anyone back, only empty head and empty heart does

3) Live as if you are to die tomorow, learn as if you are to live forever

4) The more you praise and celebrate life, there is more in life to celebrate

5) Wherever you go, go with all your heart

6) Man can live 40 days without food, about 30 days without water, about 8 days without air, but only for one second without hope and passion

7) Begin each day as if it is on purpose

8) Live with passion

9) It is passion and commitment that get us out of bed

10)You were born to be a winner, but to win , you must plan and prepare mto win.

11) It is no use saying ' We are doing our best", you have got to succeed in doing what necessary.

to be continue

1) Dare to make a difference
2) dare to dream
3)) Life is fun and full of happiness

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